noir

A random doodle of a squid party.

Superman and Batman

and Lex Luthor and the Joker

Rough for the Adventures of Alan Moore cover. It is ripping off the Scream.

Int diner early morning.
Main character (MARK) is sitting moping while drinking a cup of coffee. We see him looking at various couples around the diner performing public displays of affection. His brow furrows. He snorts angrily and returns to his drink. Then entering the diner is KATE a manic pixie dream girl who radiates energy. She sees MARK moping and decides to walk over though she has no idea who he is. She slides into his booth.

KATE
Hiya person I’ve never met and just saw 5 minutes ago. I intend to become your girlfriend who will pull you out of your of the slump and help you learn about yourself.

MARK
Stop talking to me I’m trying to get over my last relationship that ended abruptly last night. I have no intention of being with another woman because my last one hurt me so bad…

KATE
So what! I’m still happy even though I’m single mother trying to balance my career as an editor at a fashion magazine while trying to raise two adorable children in the big city.

MARK
Well I’m different I’m a struggling artist who has been hurt by women far too many times. So no I don’t want to go out with you!

MARK storms out. KATE breaks the fourth wall and gives a knowing wink to the camera. Fade to black.

Int mall later that day

MARK and his obnoxious best friend HARRY are at the mall.

HARRY
So what was so remarkable about Super Mario bros 2 was the introduction of… (Add lib)

MARK zones out and then in the corner of his eye sees KATE and her gay roommate C@RL.

MARK (to self)
No way! It can’t be the same strange woman I met earlier today.

We see a look of discomfort cross his face as he sees that KATE and C@RL notice him.

HARRY
Um dude what’s wrong you look like you saw a ghost…


MARK
Remember that crazy girl I told you about earlier. The one who I’m weirded out by but oddly attracted to.

HARRY
Yeah why?

MARK (astonished)
I might be crazy but I think I see her again. Oh hi Kate… What are you doing here?

KATE
Well C@RL here was just helping me pick out a bridesmaid’s dress for my sister’s wedding tomorrow. Do you want to help me?

MARK
Um just one second…

Pulls HARRY aside and whispers

MARK
Should I go with her?

A sly smile crosses mark’s face.
HARRY
You like her don’t you?

Mark looks around in desperation.
MARK
Yes even though she is completely crazy I think I am beginning to fall in love with her.

HARRY
Well if you think that I’ll leave you two alone. (outward) Well I’ll just be at game stop but MARK would love to join you.

MONTAGUE
KATE is shown trying on various outfits each of witch prompts MARK and C@RL to give thumbs down until the last one witch they give thumbs up to.

Int food court later
they are sitting with shopping bags slung over the chairs. They look tiered yet happy as though the just had a good time. KATE is laughing and then her cell phone rings

KATE
Hello… yes what do you mean you can’t make it… yes it’s a big deal… ok I’ll have to figure something out. Ok good bye. (puts down phone) My sitter just called she can’t babysit the kids tonight. oh and on the night of my best friend’s wedding…
MARK

I’ll babysit your kids so I can gain your trust and make you love me.


ok this is me trying my hand at 2 forms of new writing: screenwriting and parody. This is meant as a satire of romantic comedies. I tried to use every cliche ever used in those types of movies. I will be adding the rest when I finish.

new adventures of Alan Moore update: the penciling is complete for the first issue of the new adventures of Alan Moore. The inking should be done by the end of this month.
here is the final list of real people appearing in issue #1
1. Alan Moore (obviously)
2. Andrew Zimmern
3. Grant Morrison
4. Neil Gaiman
5. My friend Adam
6. My friend Henry Dykstal
7. Jason Maraz
8. Muse
9. Maha
10. Todd McFarlane (final boss)

also for the covers I plan to rip off famous art that uses Alan Moore instead of the subjects of the painting. For instance the first cover will be The Scream.

Lyrics to the Paul the octopus song: Paul, Paul, we want Paul !! Paul, Paul, we want Paul !! Paul the octopus, Paul the octopus, Paul the octopus, we love you. You pick the winner when you eat your dinner, Paul the octopus, we love you. Your tentacles are magical, they pick the winning team. You were born in England, now you live in Germany. Paul, Paul, we want Paul !! Paul the octopus, Paul the octopus, Paul the octopus, we love you. You pick the winner when you eat your dinner, Paul the octopus, we... love... YOU

For those who don't know Paul is the awesome octopus who picks World Cup winners.

a new scratch piece I did

Dwight Schrute from the office with his favorite things: bears beets battlestar galactica

My band the G-Raffs. I play guitar in it

In the awful humidity that is so often associated with summer sits a woman intently tapping on the chair leg as if a victim of some odd nervous disorder.In the distance she hears fourth of july fire crackers. they seem however to be in another world. Her husband had said he would return over an hour ago. She reaches for her cell phone once again. Like every other attempt, all she receives is a prerecorded message informing her that her husband's phone has been turned off. She curses her own poor lack of foresight in forgetting to bring the charger. Finally, after waiting another half an hour, she can take it no more and strides into the awful smelling forest surrounding the house. However, by the time the lights from the house have faded she regrets her rash action. The dark swamp seems to be an alien planet. The trees are draped with slimy moss and deep in thick mud. The woman by now in the clutches of fear pulls her cell phone from her pocket. The illumination however lasts only for several seconds as the woman's shaking hands drop the phone into the mud causing it to die as it slithers out of sight.


The sounds of the swamp have become increasingly threatening. Then, up ahead from behind a tree comes a soft glow. She breaks into a sprint leaving one of her shoes behind in the mud and falling face first into the glowing clearing. As she looks up, there sits her husband and a strange creature. "Honey it's you...we have to get out of here...there's a..." Her husband responds in a knowing tone, "I know, there is swamp monster here and he happens to be my uncle, and he appears to be extremely annoyed by you." The swamp monster nods as if to prove her husband's point. The wife responds "Wait, your uncle was reported missing years ago." At this point, the husband looks at his hands and sheepishly shares "well honey, there is something about me -- scratch that -- my family that I neglected to tell you. See my family has a genetic condition where one branch of each generation must become a swamp monster...or yeti...or something. We fill humanity's need for mythical creatures. My uncle was the monster of his generation and we are being asked to be the monsters of ours." He cringes as he waits for his wife's response. She replies in complete disbelief, "So you are saying that I need to turn into a swamp monster?" At this point his uncle intones in a grave voice "Being a monster isn't all bad, in fact you get access to magic areas of all major cities and free seats at sporting and artistic events. And you are given a nice home in a secluded swamp somewhere." The woman stands mouth gaping open until replying to her husband "Let me guess. You are going to do this anyway, right?" The husband slowly nods confirmation. In a reply that even surprises herself she says "well, then I guess I will too." With that, the uncle begins the ceremony.



The next day a young couple is reported missing. The case remains open. On the same day many people report seeing three "swamp monsters" moving away from town.

A local man's encounter with the monsters

http://magpietales.blogspot.com