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Sunday, July 4, 2010

In the awful humidity that is so often associated with summer sits a woman intently tapping on the chair leg as if a victim of some odd nervous disorder.In the distance she hears fourth of july fire crackers. they seem however to be in another world. Her husband had said he would return over an hour ago. She reaches for her cell phone once again. Like every other attempt, all she receives is a prerecorded message informing her that her husband's phone has been turned off. She curses her own poor lack of foresight in forgetting to bring the charger. Finally, after waiting another half an hour, she can take it no more and strides into the awful smelling forest surrounding the house. However, by the time the lights from the house have faded she regrets her rash action. The dark swamp seems to be an alien planet. The trees are draped with slimy moss and deep in thick mud. The woman by now in the clutches of fear pulls her cell phone from her pocket. The illumination however lasts only for several seconds as the woman's shaking hands drop the phone into the mud causing it to die as it slithers out of sight.

The sounds of the swamp have become increasingly threatening. Then, up ahead from behind a tree comes a soft glow. She breaks into a sprint leaving one of her shoes behind in the mud and falling face first into the glowing clearing. As she looks up, there sits her husband and a strange creature. "Honey it's you...we have to get out of here...there's a..." Her husband responds in a knowing tone, "I know, there is swamp monster here and he happens to be my uncle, and he appears to be extremely annoyed by you." The swamp monster nods as if to prove her husband's point. The wife responds "Wait, your uncle was reported missing years ago." At this point, the husband looks at his hands and sheepishly shares "well honey, there is something about me -- scratch that -- my family that I neglected to tell you. See my family has a genetic condition where one branch of each generation must become a swamp monster...or yeti...or something. We fill humanity's need for mythical creatures. My uncle was the monster of his generation and we are being asked to be the monsters of ours." He cringes as he waits for his wife's response. She replies in complete disbelief, "So you are saying that I need to turn into a swamp monster?" At this point his uncle intones in a grave voice "Being a monster isn't all bad, in fact you get access to magic areas of all major cities and free seats at sporting and artistic events. And you are given a nice home in a secluded swamp somewhere." The woman stands mouth gaping open until replying to her husband "Let me guess. You are going to do this anyway, right?" The husband slowly nods confirmation. In a reply that even surprises herself she says "well, then I guess I will too." With that, the uncle begins the ceremony.

The next day a young couple is reported missing. The case remains open. On the same day many people report seeing three "swamp monsters" moving away from town.

A local man's encounter with the monsters



  1. Love, love, love it. I like how you sprinkle humor in with the suspense. Well-done, JP.

  2. nice...agree with JP...the mix is pretty good...made me think of swamp thing a bit with your pic...or man thing....

  3. Brian: Swamp thing was in fact my main influence for this story.I had just finished reading the alan Moore stuff and I had swamp monsters on the brain lol

  4. nice to see you back...
    have fun blogging again!

  5. Nice to find the joys of being a monster from a monster's point of view! Free seats at sporting events is quite a draw card! Very clever!

  6. I THOUGHT I saw them sneaking away... :) Fun tale!

  7. Flashes of brilliance and bad grammar. I like this because it is unpretentious and doesn't pretend to be a poem for no reason at all.